How to dress like a golfer

Its official – golfers are the dandiest athletes on the planet. And it’s not on the links I’m talking about but I was thoroughly impressed on the sartorial elegance of both Ryder Cup teams at the opening ceremony at Celtic Manor yesterday. Even their WAGS were in on the act, they looked classy and elegant - the American women in black trousers and stylish red macs and the European’s all in white, with royal blue scarves. Football WAGS take note no cleavage, ultra tight, mini-skirted outfits or tracksuits with UGG boots.

Overall both men’s teams looked fairly presidential in their subtle pin striped suits and blue ties. The highlights for me were the American cutaway collars - very accommodating for their Windsor knots, dimples in the ties, the three-point fold pocket handkerchiefs, and yes, brown shoes worn with a charcoal grey suits – pretty nifty. Gentlemen, remember to keep the suit buttoned at all times when standing or walking. And the rule is always the top, sometimes the middle, NEVER the bottom. Now, if only Miguel Angel Jimenez can get a haircut.

C’mon Europe!

Do you know what I do?

Relationships count and when you attend networking events. The key to being a good networker is to make it about the other person you meet. I met a lady last week at such an event and right from the get-go it was always about the hard sell. At the end of our brief conversation in which she knew nothing about me but she sure had told me all about why I should invest in her products, I felt like asking her would you care to know what I do for a living? Maybe it was from the way I was dressed (immaculately I might add) she automatically assumed I fit her target market. Now that may very well have been the case but when networking always try to make it about the other person. Strive to put the focus on the other person and ask probing questions about them to build trust and goodwill. I admit, it's not easy - I sometimes struggle to find something interesting in another person because I find my work so fascinating but it is better to be more interested in others than interesting.

If I meet you at an event and the first thing you do is hand me your business card with the sole intention of eliciting some business from me – chances are you are not going to get anything. It should never be patently obvious that you are only interested in selling to me and not interested in what I do. Here are some obvious signs to look out for or to avoid like the plague. Filtered listening or only picking up or responding to what is useful to you when engaging in conversation with another person. Rehearsing your response so it sounds like you’re only interested in getting to the next part of your business pitch. Interrupting the other person’s conversation to get your pitch back on track or to get to the end of the customer spiel. Avoid coming across like a used car salesman and instead master the art of soft skills to get people to reveal what you want without them knowing you are actually doing it. One way is simply to begin to build relationships with the people you meet while networking and not the hard sell.

A politically correct image

It’s full campaign mode for the candidates in the Juja and Makadara by-election and the savvy politician knows that his or her public image is just as important as the issues. The astute politician should be re-examining the way they present themselves in order to be ready when voters ask: Do they fit the image of what I want my public representative to look like. Isn't it a question of style over substance you may quibble, but politicians running campaigns most acknowledge that what they wear, how they speak and how they present themselves plays a part in their ability to convey their message. Political figures from Margaret Thatcher and Gorbachev to Sarkozy and Canada’s Stephen Harper have all undergone image coaching in communication skills, handling the media, dressing and body language. In fact, presidential candidate Al Gore payed a consultant $15,000 a month during the 2000 presidential campaign to give him a makeover.

Here at home for example, ditching the dark glasses or transition lenses especially when speaking at a kamkunji or interviewing on TV, is important because eye contact is vital as it lets us (the voters) know that you are being sincere in what you are saying. If I can’t see your eyes, the instinct is to think you’re hiding something. People are affected by the way you dress and dressing to convey authority, commitment, professionalism is crucial. Dressing up rather than down conveys this whether you like it or not. Thinking that people won’t really care what you wear is simply hubris. Using the psychology of colour like blue to convey trust or red to convey power can influence the public instead of just wearing party colours. Body language (upright, open gestures) and speech patterns (using the power of three for example) can all be used to influence the voters in a subconscious way. A good public image (how you are seen, heard and behave) won’t necessarily secure you an election victory, but it will help you be listened to, possibly believed and subsequently voted for.

Why your handshake is a character indicator

I have heard through the grapevine that a certain potential presidential candidate in 2012 has a weak handshake. Why is your handshake so important? The handshake may appear little more than a formality, but it is also a view into the personality of the person on the other end. The strength of contact can quite literally be an indicator of character.

A firm handshake is vital; I certainly find it makes a strong impression on me. If someone in a powerful position offers me the limp lettuce or a wet fish, I always question how they got where they did, and wonder where their weak point is. One study on handshakes showed that people are two times more likely to remember you if you shake hands with them. The researchers also found that people react to those with whom they shake hands by being more open and friendly.

Some people tend to go over board and are almost fierce in the way they grasp your unsuspecting paw. No need to over do it! It is quite sufficient to take the hand, clasp it firmly and then let go. Maintain good eye contact, open body positioning, and a smile to go with that shake. Holding the other person’s hand a few fractions of a second longer than you are naturally inclined to do will also convey additional sincerity and quite literally “holds” the other person’s attention while you exchange greetings. It can be interesting to watch out for personality traits in the way a hand is proffered.
* The person to offer the hand first is generally the most assertive
* If no hand is offered in return, that person is either very shy, has a hygiene phobia or is trying to put you down!
* A dominant handshake is offered with the palm face down.
* A submissive hand shake is when the palm faces up.
* Aim for equal status - arm outstretched with the hand horizontal,
thumb facing upwards.
* Start talking before you let go - “How do you do, it’s good to meet you”.
As for that potential presidential candidate, pressing the flesh is going to be your dominant form of interaction with the general public. Remember that you are being judged on your handshake whether consciously or subconsciously, so make it count.

And if this doesn't convince you, then how about prolonging your life. The strength of your handshake could be a clue to how long you'll live, say scientists from University College London. They matched older people's balance, grip strength and ability to get up from a chair with their risk of an earlier death. Those who did best were likely to live longer, the British Medical Journal reported.

Would you wear this on TV?

What do you think of our news anchors and presenters on TV, more pointedly, does what they wear ever affect your ability to digest your dinner or breakfast. If one chooses a career in TV, your sartorial choices will be dissected by millions of people and will affect whether you come across as a dignified professional with style or just another pretty face wearing an awful top. The objective should be to appear trustworthy yet stylish. I’m constantly amazed by the wardrobe choices that many news readers and presenters pick which is at best distracting to the viewers and at worst killing their credibility. You do have a style personality but as a trusted news source, you need a state-of-the-art appearance so it is assumed that everything associated with you outclasses the competition. Nothing personal, but I happen to prefer my news readers to have a little grey in their hair rather than appear like they graduated from college yesterday. The gravitas of an older person I think lends more trustworthiness to a newscast. So for the current crop of 'young uns' seen on all channels, you can come across as more mature in the world of journalism (not old and tired) by what you wear. This does not have to sacrifice one’s femininity or youthful vigour but dressing with care to flatter your body type, using the psychology of colour to enhance your appearance and wearing clothes that fit you well. I won’t be handing out individual barbs or bouquets but here are some egregious examples of what not to wear. For women these include – manly looking blazer suits also known as “daddy blazers”, ruffled tops and those shiny blouses(you're reading the news, not auditioning for a musical, conservative should be your byword); and for men – suits that are too big (you look like a school boy trying to dress up, a major credibility killer), black shirts with ties (you look too much like a mafia gangster), tie knots so large that they swallow your neck (please get with the programme, slim ties have been in vogue for a number of years now). Any other style misses you see on TV?