Do you know what I do?

Relationships count and when you attend networking events. The key to being a good networker is to make it about the other person you meet. I met a lady last week at such an event and right from the get-go it was always about the hard sell. At the end of our brief conversation in which she knew nothing about me but she sure had told me all about why I should invest in her products, I felt like asking her would you care to know what I do for a living? Maybe it was from the way I was dressed (immaculately I might add) she automatically assumed I fit her target market. Now that may very well have been the case but when networking always try to make it about the other person. Strive to put the focus on the other person and ask probing questions about them to build trust and goodwill. I admit, it's not easy - I sometimes struggle to find something interesting in another person because I find my work so fascinating but it is better to be more interested in others than interesting.

If I meet you at an event and the first thing you do is hand me your business card with the sole intention of eliciting some business from me – chances are you are not going to get anything. It should never be patently obvious that you are only interested in selling to me and not interested in what I do. Here are some obvious signs to look out for or to avoid like the plague. Filtered listening or only picking up or responding to what is useful to you when engaging in conversation with another person. Rehearsing your response so it sounds like you’re only interested in getting to the next part of your business pitch. Interrupting the other person’s conversation to get your pitch back on track or to get to the end of the customer spiel. Avoid coming across like a used car salesman and instead master the art of soft skills to get people to reveal what you want without them knowing you are actually doing it. One way is simply to begin to build relationships with the people you meet while networking and not the hard sell.